Don’t Think You Haven Been Enabling? Look Back and See!
Have you been enabling a friend or loved one? You may not have thought so before today. However, when you look back, you may see that you have had plenty of behaviors of an enabler. If you would like to quit being the enabler, you must first recognize how you have enabled the addict in your life in the first place. How does family history affect addiction? Were you using at one point and enabled your loved one or friend to do the same? That is just one example that you may not have realized before now.
Taking Responsibility for the Addict’s Behavior
Think back to previous situations. Have you ever taken responsibility for the addict’s behavior? Have they gotten into an argument with someone while drunk? You may have blamed yourself because you invited them to the party. Have they gotten a DUI? You may have blamed yourself for not answering the phone when they called you up at 3 a.m. If you have been taking responsibility for the addict’s behavior, you have been enabling them. How does family history affect addiction? You may realize you have done this with others in the family too. Once you recognize you have been doing this, you can put a plan into action so you can stop.
Picking Up the Pieces
How does family history affect addiction with picking up the pieces? Most family members, friends and other loved ones of an addict will pick up the pieces when the addict makes a mistake. They may let the addict move in when they lose their home because they spent their money on drugs and didn’t pay the bills. You may have paid for their meals because they spent too much of their paycheck partying. If you have been picking up the pieces, recognize this behavior of yours. Once you do that, you can learn to stop enabling the addict in this way.
Go to Al-Anon
If you truly want to stop enabling the addict in your life, once you realize you have been doing so, start going to Al-Anon. These are meetings held in various areas for family members, friends, acquaintances and other loved ones of an addict. The meetings help you to cope and understand the addict better. They also offer you support so you can stop being the enabler in the addict’s life.
These are some of the ways you may have been enabling someone. If you recognize you have done these things, work on stopping these behaviors as soon as possible.